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East Bay Family Law Blog

Why are goals important in child custody situations?

Child custody decisions usually aren't easy to make, but your children are counting on you to have everything in order for them to thrive. When you and your ex are going through a divorce, it might behoove you to take a little time to sit down and figure out what goals you have for your parenting relationship.

For many parents these days, co-parenting is the chosen model they will follow after a divorce. Whether this is the type you choose or not, these tips might help you to define goals for your parenting model, as well as some basic goals for your child's upbringing.

Where should I live during the divorce process?

When you are going through a divorce, it can be a very stressful and tense time. The last thing you want is to come home to your estranged partner, running the risk of toxic fights and further stress. However, you probably want to keep the environment for your children as normal as possible, and you are likely to worry about what they will be thinking and feeling.

Making the choice as a father to stay or remain in the family home is a tough one. There are social, emotional and legal implications in the state of California that you should consider. As a father, it is likely that you will be concerned with the future custody of you children, and where you decide to live during the divorce process may play a part in this.

Are stock options included in your marital property?

One of the major aspects of divorce is the division of marital assets. For instance, you and your future ex-husband will have to decide if one of you will keep your Antioch home or whether you should sell it and split the proceeds. You probably have other high-value and complex assets that you also need to divide as part of your divorce settlement.

Stock options and restricted stocks fall into the realm of complex assets that are often hard for divorcing couples to properly valuate and divide. In order to ensure that these assets receive the proper valuation in your divorce, it is vital that you understand these assets and the available options.

Protecting your property: Separate and marital assets

When you got married, it was for better or worse. You planned to stay with your spouse for the long term, but clearly, your spouse didn't feel the same way. She recently served you with divorce documents, and now you need to do everything you can to protect yourself.

You don't have children, so your primary concern is your property. First, understand that California is a community property state. That means that when you get married, you and your spouse become a community. When you become a community, both of you own all assets equally. Debts also become community debts.

In a divorce, be sure to treat your retirement plan right

While what to do with your house in Antioch might be your main concern if you are planning to divorce, it is important not to overlook your retirement accounts. These assets might actually be the most vital to your future, especially if retirement is getting significantly closer. In fact, your pension and other retirement accounts could have a higher value than your house.

Since your future depends on those retirement accounts, you should spend some time finding out how your divorce might affect them. The following information might give you an idea about how to handle your retirement accounts during divorce.

Do you know the things to include in a parenting agreement?

It's hard to imagine a situation in which you're able to co-parent with success. After all, you're going through a divorce and you're not exactly getting along with your spouse.

Even so, you need to remember this: It's imperative to provide your child with the stability he or she needs to grow.

Determine how detailed you need a child custody agreement

The child custody agreement that you have with your ex is where you should be able to turn when you have questions about any related matters. While there are some people who can use a relaxed and informal child custody agreement, many people need as much detail as possible.

When you are trying to determine what you need to include in your child custody agreement, think about how well you and you ex can work together. If you think that you do need a detailed arrangement, here are some points to consider:

Prepare yourself for your first year after divorce

The first year after a divorce is complex. You have to deal with learning how to live without a spouse, but there are many other considerations to think about. You have to learn how to navigate life as a single person and how to parent as a single parent. These changes can be challenging but they don't have to be stressful.

You might be surprised at some of the changes that you have to make as you venture through that first year. Preparing yourself for these changes now can help you to feel less stressed about the situation as you move forward with your new life.

Consider these co-parenting tips to ease tensions

Trying to work with your ex to raise the children you share might be a challenging undertaking. Some parents are now choosing to co-parent, which involves keeping consistent rules between both homes. Co-parents also do a lot of things together with the child, but the parents aren't in a romantic relationship any longer.

Parents who decide to co-parent are likely going to come to the conclusion that it isn't as easy as what they thought it would be. There are going to be some decisions that come with difficulties and enormous stress. Here are some ways that you might be able to make the co-parenting relationship less contentious, even when you don't agree with your ex:

Plan for raising the children before permanent orders are issued

Parents who are going through a divorce still have to make sure that the children are taken care of. Before the final child custody orders are finalized, there might be temporary orders issued.

Regardless of what type of order you have in your case, you and your ex need to work together to raise the children. This is often difficult because you and your ex probably have issues with each other because of the divorce. Consider these tips to help you out while you are adjusting to working with an ex on child custody matters:

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