When negotiating your California divorce, to find the solutions that are the best fit for your family, you sometimes have to think outside of the box. If the two of you are struggling to agree on custody arrangements, it might be time to consider bird’s-nest custody.
With this type of custody, the kids don’t have to transition from mom’s house to dad’s place. Instead, they continue to live in the family home while the parents move in and out during their time with the children.
Which families can make bird’s-nest parenting work?
Since bird’s-nest custody can be expensive — the parents must be able to afford the upkeep on a total of three residences, his, hers and theirs — it’s typically only viable for individuals with high net worth. The parents also must be committed to maintaining a civil relationship with one another and be respectful of the shared spaces.
Let’s delve into more pros and cons of bird’s-nest parenting.
The children typically appreciate not having to change homes every few days or every other week. That added stability can make it easier for them to adjust to the new normal of their parents’ divorce.
If you have ever searched frantically for your child’s soccer uniform or spelling book only to learn they are at their other parent’s house, you may really appreciate all the kids’ belongings remaining in one spot.
It can be quite challenging to continue with this type of co-parenting arrangement when one or both former spouses have moved on romantically. Also, both parents have to agree to the same basic house rules and housekeeping standards to avoid resentments developing. When you consider that people often initially break up over just those sort of grievances, that can become a problem.
Should you try bird’s-nest parenting?
Discussing your options with your family law attorney can bring some much-needed clarity to your custody options. You may decide that this non-traditional custody arrangement best meets your family’s unique needs. Alternatively, you may choose a more typical co-parenting agreement. But by adding yet another possibility to your custody options, you can be sure that you pick the best one that works for you and your children.